High on Mountain Dew

I had a strange and uncomfortable experience today. But first, here is a little backstory. I used to be a soda junkie. We’re talking minimum 2-3 cans per day everyday. I kicked the habit cold turkey four years ago. It was literally like kicking a drug habit. I had massive headaches for two weeks, I had caffeine cravings and fatigue because my body need a caffeine jolt. I even saw a doctor about it because I felt like shit. I now only drink soda occasionally at restaurants and such. But more importantly, I don’t like soda anymore. I would say at the most I only drink one can of soda every two months or so, if even that much.

So that brings us to today. I’ve been on a junk food binge the last few days. Today I wanted an Italian sub. No, not that Subway or Quiznos bullshit, I wanted a real old school Italian sub. So I went to a local place called Philly Flava. Although their specialty is philly cheese steaks, they also make some decent subs. I figured that if I’m going to eat junk food I might as well buy a Mountain Dew to go with it. The sub was pretty good, not great but pretty damn good. The Dew washed it down. Everything was good, or so it seemed. Then about fifteen minutes later I began to feel real jittery and speeded up. I wasn’t sure what the hell it was at first, then I connected the dots and realized that I had just drank a giant size Mountain Dew (two cans worth), and I haven’t had any soda in my system within the last three or four months. Yes folks, I was high on Mountain Dew.

The moral to the story is that soda is still bad. Discuss this amongst your friends and loved ones.